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bigbonton.org

This old blog has provided so much in the past few years.
Diversions, a creative outlet,
a raisin et cetera, um, I mean a raison d'etre,
and so now, on St Pattys day 2006 we ported over these postings
onto it's own Movable Type template and we announce:
bigbonton.org
Go!

Forsythe Fountain is now green

It's a big week in Savannah G-A.
St Pattys is on Friday and they're kicking off the celebration with green dye in one of their fountains. It's a high noon meet and greet, fun for Grandpa O'Kelly to pontificate for the kids. Groups of school kids in school uniforms punched out their songs. They were clearly well drilled on their performance.
We stopped by, said hi, grabbed a sandwich and chips and enjoyed warm March weather.

A truck, an ax and thou

This photo has all the elements of a good 48 hours along the shore of the Gulf of Mexico: fire, food, and a blue tarp.

All hail the ubiquitous blue tarp!
The post-hurricane source of keeping dry, getting by, making due.
We were smoking 60 lbs of ribs, 30 fish steaks, zucchini, squash, onions, and anything not nailed down.

Horses on the island

These horses are wild. Their great-great Grandparent-horses were in the Carnegie and/or Rockefeller stable on Cumberland Island, Georgia. Which explains why they're the fittest looking wild horse I've seen. That's compared to those in the Black Rock Desert, Nevada and Ocracoke, North Carolina.

The annual February warm spell is on us, days in the 60s or even 70s.
A week ago we had some freezing - seriously, it froze for an hour or so before dawn.
Of course it thawed an hour or so after sunrise.

No more tidbits to write for now, it's a nice afternoon to sit by the fountain and read in the warm sun.
"Best Essays of 2005"
"Elmer Gantry" by Sinclair Lewis
and the eternal "CCNA Certification",
then ZZzzz . . .

We're out here having fun in the warm Carolina sun.
Fine, & You?

Happy Valentines Day Sweetheart

click image to enlarge in new window

A beautiful rose for you my darling Valentine.

I found an island in your arms,
a country in your eyes.
- The Doors -

One Love, One Heart
let's get together and feel alright
- Bob Marley -

There is only one happiness in life,
to love and be loved.
- George Sand -

If you would be loved, love and be lovable.
- Benjamin Franklin -

Love, like a river, will cut a new path
whenever it meets an obstacle.
- Crystal Middlemas -

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach ...
[see complete version in comments]
- Elizabeth Barrett Browning -

pre-Valentine coaching

If today you are lucky enough to be with someone to have and to hold
make sure they’re well had and well held.
There are people sleeping alone tonight with cold feet!

It takes a lot of good luck and hard work to find and/or become a good catch.
All of that goes to waste if a good catch is not caught and kept.

1/ Keep yourself relevant as a sweetheart in the courtship marketplace.
2/ As for your S.O. (significant other), once you catch ‘em they require food, water, and recreation. Forget about training them, just recall how perfect they once were before you got to know them.
3/ Love is a verb, now go to it with a little Pep!

Looney Bulbs

There’s more to flowers than just roses, carnations, daisies, etc.
and this looney wild child bulb (below) proves that bulbs produce more than just tulips.


click on image to enlarge in new window

Overheard from a girl on a cell phone conversation:
Shut up just shut up . . .
(sarcastically) You’re right you’re always right . . .
quit it just quit it . . .
[and then]
I love you, goodbye.
Oh wait, what are we doing on Valentines Day?
. . .
Love is Looney!

Valentines ultra-Sarah-Announce-Protocol (u-Sap)

just out of Beta:
Valentines ultra-Sarah-Announce-Protocol (u-Sap)

Incorporating the OSI Model Level 1 and Level 2 of the incumbent Telco in Mayberry, North Carolina, the browser becomes "Sarah" the telephone operator while you choose your role as either Deputy Barney Fife or his sweetheart Thelma Lou. Enjoy some telephone sweet talking!

Prepare to connect to your sweetie
by first closing your eyes for 12 seconds. See the future, be the future -
with Valentines ultra-Sarah-Announce-Protocol
(Valentines u-Sap)!

Begin.
Deep breath, inhale deep. Then exhale in puffs.
Relax, let Cupid channel Thelma Lou and Barney, connect using Valentines u-Sap!

Steps toward the experience:
1/ currently be on the online interweb, netweb, or an onsite-webline.
2/ turn on the speakers on your computer.
3/ click the link above.
4/ "Sarah" the browser will pick up and say
"Hello u-Sap, Coo your Valentine, please".
NOTE: Ignore any modem noise, you are hearing "Sarah". Her English voice is in development.
5/ your response will be either
"I am Thelma Lou and I love Barney Fife"
or
"I am Barney Fife and I love Thelma Lou".

Repeat as a mantra for the network link duration.
Your response may be spoken into a microphone or typed into the comments section but it must contain repetition of the above mantra in order to reach u-Sap Critical Mass .

6/ you have just over 90 seconds in u-Sap mode before you'll need to refresh the connection by clicking again - like putting a coin in a pay phone!

Comments on the Valentines ultra-Sarah-Announce-Protocol
(Valentines u-Sap)?

pre-Valentine Aloalo lahilahi

Start now finding and flowering a potential date
or you'll be singing "Hello Walls" on Valentines Day 2006.

Above is a fine speciman of the
Chinese Habiscus
Hibiscus Rosa-Sinensis
Aloalo lahilahi

A red hibiscus, it's the official flower of Hawaii.
Common enough to be used as hedges.
Lush enough to form 20 foot tall walls of flowers.
Dat's some nice hedges, bro!

No kidding, get ready for 2-14-06
or you'll be hurtin'-4-certain in less than 2 weeks.

Armadillo

These guys are migrating up from Texas and Mexico, rooting their way into everyones yard, taking over. This guy was on a barrier island, rooting, doing his thing without regard for his locale. He'd be doing the same thing anywhere.

They carry their own armor and appear cleaner than their greasy predecessors: meet the new possum, Opossum 2.0. The old joke is "possum on the half shell".

Was hard to resist touching this one, wanted to feel the armor and see what he was all about. The ears especially, like little flowers.
They're practically blind, he walked right up to the toe of my boot, but when he realized I wasn't a tree stump he hopped away in a bunny / antelope escape trot. This is the only photo that was not blurry, they never stop moving their heads, always rooting and sniffing.
Odd that he didn't know my boot from a tree stump, didn't he notice my all-day boot smell? Maybe I was camouflaged by a combo of low tide, salt, and horse biscuits.
Get used to them, they're making themselves right at home.

Myers BBQ

"Looks like home, Tastes like home"

note the long shadows of a January afternoon

The 1st stop in the 3rd year of the Bonton Barbeque Tour of America!
That's right, 3rd year - 2004, 2005, 2006.
Q: . . . and what have You done with your life in the past 3 years?
A: Well, I went to as many BBQ places as I could and photoblogged them for the betterment of mankind. And for posterity, uh, for my legacy, you know . . . 9 states and 2 coasts so far".

We knew this place was good when we pulled into the parking lot behind a powerline truck, one of those big rigs with a bucket. They got to park anywhere they wanted.

There was a split wood pile on the side of the house so we inspected the premises before going inside. A smoke house is in the back with a big pile of wood waiting to be split after school by the son. This place really is a former residential dwelling, thus the slogan "looks like home, etc". Any Q joint you see with a tin roofed smoke house in back, well, just go in and hand over your money for a buffet.
Myers specializes in hickory and oak pit cooked BBQ & country cooking. My stomach is growling with fond memories.

The clientele was lunchtime landscaping crew, lineman, a table of "who knows what they do during the day", and one guy with his female better half. They were making plans, I think it was a honey-do list from her to him. He was going along with anything she said. Maybe she let him have some Q so she could get her way with him. Thank goodness for at least one female in the place, she classed up the joint with her ambition and all that.

Across the street is a large corporate building with a security gate. Whatever they do in there, I'm sure the cubicle dwellers daydream about opening a BBQ place like this one, right off the highway.
They have an all you can eat deal but not an actual buffet, you return to the front for a refill and they lay it on you with a smile. The Q was so good that I forgot about getting some Smoked Chicken! That's Smoked chicken, not BBQ chicken. Smoked chicken - imagine how tender and tasty that must be. Smoked Turkey is so good, wish I'd had some smoked chicken. . Right now, missing the smoked chicken feels like a greater loss than it did at the time, when I was full-up on 2 plates of Q. My stomach is growling (again).

When I realized I was too full to have the smoked chicken I began a sit down strike. The plan was to digest enough to try a sample of the smoked chicken. Just a mere morsel, a wafer thin slice. We hung out.
Their bulletin board includes many local celebrities, like some blues musicians that look like they've had a fairly easy life. After the lunch rush I was the only person in the place. The radio played Elvis singing "Kentucky Rain". Poor Elvis, he sings:
"I don't know why you've gone,
what you're running to, or from,
all I know is I want to take you home".
He rhymes "gone", "home", and "from" using an "uh" sound.
Everybody now give me an Elvis Uh-uh-Huh!
Uh-uh-Huh!

There wasn't much to talk about with the lady that was sweeping up and I think I made her self-conscious when I took a flash photo. She likes Elvis but didn't want to talk about The King just now, she was sweeping. When I mentioned that today, January 8th, is the Birthday of Elvis she seemed to have had enough, as if it weren't true.
Well it is true each and every year on January 8th!
So I got a gallon of tea ($4) to-go and left.

God as my witness, I shall return soon and I'll put a hurting on that smoked chicken, we're even planning on calling ahead to make sure they put a few yard birds on just for me.

Myers BBQ Restaurant and Catering
Gerald & Carolyn Myers, Owners
10324 Wilson Blvd. at I-77 & Hwy 21 N (Exit 24)
Blythewood, SC 29016
Hours Mon - Sat 11 - 9pm

Port-o-Desk

And so begins another year on the road.
we gots da wi-fi notebook, a digicam, old school yellow pages, dead tree folio, and an MP3 enabled jambox with which to spread some joyous grooves -
all on a standup desk-like platform
with a 4 wheel drive and we actually lock the hubs!
logon, logoff!
bonton roulement en 2006

January 1st Polar Bear Swim

Sullivans Island, SC. 1/1/06
A pleasant day, about 55 degrees, sunny with little wind.
People pay a small amount to a charity to swim together in the Atlantic on New Years day. There was a large turn out due to the nice weather.

The scene changed post-swim, the sun went behind clouds and it got chilly.
It is a polar bear swim but there was no ice involved except in some coolers on the beach. The Wisconsin or Alaska Polar bears would look down their cold noses but hey, we don't control the weather, snowbirds.

Saw something new to me: some sort of flying Dutchman contraption.
Take an inflatable boat, strap on an ultralite hang-glider-airplane with a two stroke engine and large fan blade for a propeller and risk your life 200 feet above the land and sea. Seats one or two, depending on weight and amount of sense. I imagine you must keep seated and hang on!
There were several buzzing around in the air, really added to the feeling of being in a fun scene.
Reminded me of Black Rock Desert during Burning Man, where you say to yourself "This sure is fun. I might die. Let's do it again!"

Live Nativity Scene

This used to be more common than today so this was a real treat.
In the stable-stage we have Mary, Joseph, and 3 kids dressed like sheep, or little lambs, in their case. Throw in some wise men and shepherds on the side and you have yourself a live nativity scene!
Everyone was very pleased to be participating and the atmosphere was serene. A choir was on the porch in the background singing the standards.
To the right was a bonfire and some hot food, something over rice.
Interesting how it seemed both active and still at the same time.
It felt like nothing was going on and also something big was happening. Had some nice hearted laughs with the grandma's of the lambs. They were cutting up, playing their parts. Good kids.
Merry Christmas 2005!

Sheep in a Manger

Bahh Bahhhh Baah

Mary, Joseph

& the Birthday Boy Savior

Skinned into a toy

click on photo to enlarge in new window

If you haven't made all your shopping trips and spent all your present money, here is a fine gift idea from the 1700s.

Ye Olde Gift-ee Idea-ee
circa 1701

First: Skin a small lamb, goat, or pony. - Did you say pony? Pay special attention to the snout, ears, and eyelids. It's the little details that add that special touch - the eyelashes, for example.
Second: Assemble it to form a life-like image of its former self using big tacks to hold the hide to a platform. Include a pull string and wheels attached to where the hoofs were (not shown).
Then: Present it to your kids so they can pull it around.
They'll be the envy of the colony!

In the future your Great-Great-grandkids will grow up to treasure it and keep it on a shelf in front of very Grandma-like flowery wallpaper.

The Veiled Lady

click photos to enlarge in new window
The Gibbs Museum of Art, Charleston, SC.

No Photography! - the sign said.
Lucky for us I cannot read.

A magnificent bust, non?
Oh! She eees too bee-yoo-tee-foo.

Start dropping hints

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You can't get what you want 'till you know what you want,
& in this case, 'till they know what you want.

So if your little hearts desire is an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range-model BB gun with a compass on the side then start cluing in the powers that be. And don't waiver if all you hear is "You'll shoot your eye out kid!"
Stay the course. Eyes on the prize, just look above at Any Kid USA. He scored! Nice hat too!

Here's my hint:
I want to I feel as complete as this kid feels. Is it the BB gun or the fact that someone cared for him?
I want to be asked and heard.
I want a Santa that gets it.
Three "I wants" spelled out & posted. Hint hint.

Yes, "A Christmas Story" aired the other night. Complete with Ralphie and his Dads Major Award lamp.

Remember the made-for-TV Saturday Christmas movie "JT"? About an inner city kid that found a stray cat, kept it among junk on an abandoned lot. JT housed the cat in an old stove and fed him bites from his school lunch. The cat had an injured eye so JT made an eyepatch. The injured stray cat was the only loving connection JT felt.
The dialog I recall from "JT" takes place in the kitchen after Grandma arrives from the bus station:
Grandma: (to JT) What you want for Christmas, Child?
JT: I want me this cat I found. Can it stay with me?
Mom: (defeated) Just what I need, another mouth to feed.

Bummer for JT.
Face it, we are dared, double dog dared, triple dared,
oh, go ahead - we're triple dog dared! That means we just have to do it, it's a triple dog dare. No choice. Just have to do it.
Buy less and care more.
That's a bigger challenge than sticking your tongue to a frozen flagpole.

-- and when you do get what you want,
don't shoot your eye out with it.

Thanksgiving 2005

click photo to enlarge in new window

Why this is the best holiday:

Corn bread - it's so good as dressing, stuffing, muffins, even for breakfast as a corn meal pancake.

Planes, Trains, & Automobiles (1987 film) - Steve Martin & John Candy can't get home. Ever been there? Ever said "If I ever get home I'm going to nail my feet to the ground"?

Hanging out in a warm kitchen (where the action is) while the slack-jawed stare at the boob-tube.

No pressure to get meaningful gifts. Bring what you enjoy and share.

Eat, relax, have dessert, walk - but not too far, get warm, TV, eat, relax, repeat.

Long distance phone calls are a convenient escape hatch. Most people are available for the call and are mellowed-out too!

Holidays are just starting so Santa & his minions have yet to be overdone.
This year I woke up to "Little Drummer Boy" on my clock radio alarm - before Halloween. I said before Halloween!
I changed the alarm before I did anything else that morning.
Now I wake safely to a CD.
Pah-rum-pum-pum-pum on that October morning was worse than the morning the station was playing "Tie a Yellow Ribbon" when the alarm went off. Both times I had to tell myself "this shouldn't ruin your day".

---------------------
And,
Two sets of prose supporting the theory
"why this is the best holiday":

To Autumn
Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness!
Close bosom-friend of the maturing sun;
. . . (see comments)
- John Keats. 1795–1821
---------------------

Got my ticket, grabbed my load.
Conductor done yelling all aboard.
Find a seat and rare way back.
Watch this train going down the track.
Bring it on home.
(paraphrased)
---------------------

College football rivalry season

click photo to enlarge in new window

It begins this weekend, the 3 weekend span of the most intense pigskin match-ups.
I like what the Wall Street Journal said today:
"The winners are usually seen carrying off some explicable trophy like a skillet, an axe, or a wagon wheel".

USC Trojans vs. UCLA Bruins (whatsa Bruin?). This years game could be a classic, they're both good again.

Texas Longhorns vs. Texas A&M Aggies (one sided to U of Texas, but emotional still).

The "Big Game" between Stanford and Cal - although many dislike their claim to the nickname "Big Game", they have a right to it: a few years ago the daughter of a sitting President of the USA chose to attend Stanford. I doubt she even considered my alma mater. Throw in UC Berkeley and that's big, son. Add "The Play" to the claim and who can argue except the jealous? Or those that actually follow football - no upsets, low ticket demand, but games are close and it means something to 'em. As if they don't have enough else to brag about...

Florida Gators vs. Florida State Seminoles. Imagine a Seminole warrior on horseback spiking a flaming spear at midfield then screaming at the sky. Do you know of any more impressive way to get up for a game? I got goosebumps thinking about it.

Georgia Bulldogs vs. Rambling Wrecks from Georgia Tech.
[side note: Go ACC basketball! The best round ball in the world!]

Alabama Crimson Tide vs. Auburn War Eagles: a sacred experience, most costly ticket. Lives revolve around the schedule - funerals are postponed (put Grandma on ice, we've got a game to win!)

BYU vs. Utah - the Holy War, a big game to someone, bless their hearts.

Army - Navy. Most sober student section, best organized, least colorful, older fans like it but is it college?

Virginia vs. Virginia Tech - the stadium with the highest GPA on the field, I'll bet.

and so on; all in all a good way to spend a Saturday.
especially when it's:
University of South Carolina Fighting Gamecocks
vs. Clemson University
Everybody likes to beat Clemson, their athletics are consistently tops across the board. Womens Volleyball, B-ball, you name the sport, they've probably had at least one national championship.
But teach your kids the ABCs, Anywhere But Clemson.

Go Go Gamecocks! (Wins mean more when they're rare.)
Go Cocks! Beat Clemson!

Sunday fun with a crab

click image to enlarge in new window

The temperature was the 70s, we went to the beach.
After a swim we sat.
It didn't take long to find entertainment using a fierce-looking shell in a tidal pool.

1st: Place a 250 million year old living fossil in plain site near a tourist walking area.
2nd: Sit back and watch the reactions as group after group see it near their bare feet.

Fun for hours!
Each group of beachcombers will think they've discovered the monster.

Four football throwing boys stopped and dared each other to see if it would move - they moved on without getting too close.

One kid was double-dog-dared to touch it, so he got a long stick and was going to mess with it until another kid pushed him from behind.
He jumped and yelped like a schoolgirl. They played like they were mad at each other, using that distraction as an honorable escape from the horror.

Several sets of footprints walked comma shaped detours around the threat.

Elderly women warned their men to steer clear!
Either the men agreed & complied or they ignored the warning while suddenly getting interested in something way over there, in the safe viewing zone.

These horseshoe crabs aren't concerned about having fun on a Sunday afternoon.
They can go a year without eating! Along with cockroaches (& the meek), they shall inherit the earth.

facts:
The Horseshoe Crab has light blue copper-based blood.
They eat at night and burrow for worms and mollusks, feeding with their dozen legs (most with claws).

The eyes have a range of about 3 feet and are used only for locating mates.
Each spring during the high tides of the new and full moons the females arrive by the thousands.
Males, 1/3 the size of females, cluster along the water's edge as the females arrive.
The male hangs on to the female's shell and is pulled up the beach to the high tide line.
She pauses every few feet to dig a hole and deposit as many as 20,000 pearly green, birdshot-sized eggs.
He tags along in tow. Smiling, even grinning & giggling, no doubt. You know.

Masks were used from their skeletons back in the days when people wanted a threatening mask.

Next Sunday:
Chapter 2 of Pass Times 101.
"Gluing a Dollar Coin to the Floor; Observations and Techniques. "
Bonton Press, all rights reserved

Got Wood!

Good wood - for a fire.
Since there's no perspective on this photo I'll spell it out:
this woodpile is about 12 feet high, the base of the tree was over 4 feet in diameter. These logs are too big for a person to handle, we had hydraulics doing the heavy lifting.
Too bad we had to cut it down but look at the internal rot in the trunk - would have come down during our next Hurricane, which may happen at any moment the way it's going these days.
Hurricane Sigma - the summation of all storms (a calculus joke). I don't hear anyone laughing but one nerd snorted milk out his nose. Sigma. Summation. Hardee-har nerd-o.

We need this wood for the upcoming holidays, hey it's November already.
Prepare now for your oyster roast, pig picking, and New Years Eve bonfire! Ain't a party 'till something gets burned!
Need any wood? Over here, come & get it but you must invite me to the burning!

Raven and full moon

Happy Halloween 2005
Not a scary image but it has all the components:
raven, full moon, remote coastal town (think of Hitchcocks "the Birds").

Maybe it's not creepy due to blue sky, the lone bird is just hanging out, and I was in a great mood when I took this photo. The cool vibe of a Spring Sunday afternoon walk overpowers any Halloween macabre.
Was hiking along the Northern California coast in Point Reyes National Seashore.
One of my favorite places in the world, Point Reyes includes Limontour Beach where the waves break with a perfect sound. Each wave is a shore-break; the sets surge in with a whoosh and whoomp sound. They often have an air pocket trapped in the tube that blurps out with a whale or porpoise breaching sound.
On the north end of Limontour sea lions are laying about, on the south end are waterfalls from the cliffs, running directly into the Pacific.
Kite surfing, horses, beach bonfires, isolation.
Now that's a nice beach, eh?

He's pitching a tent

Really, literally.
What?

Scene of a wedding

This is why I have not posted in a week:

click to enlarge in new window (large file)

Not only was I been busy with the logistics,
but I've also had to cope with the mental aspects
of the whole shebang.
Someone else got to go to Las Vegas
while I stayed to clean up - traumatic!

National Wild and Scenic Rivers, SC & NC

Such as the Chattooga, the Nantahala, and the Whasitcalhuh.

click to enlarge in new window

Count the 7 hill ranges - the last one is faint, on the horizon.
We swam in several rivers, camped, hiked along ridgelines and alongside the whitewater.
Snorkeled in the billibongs. Strong current! Strong current!
How To:
Get underwater. Find large anchored stones and hook your arm to keep from moving downstream faster than you know is safe.
I surfed several slick rocks while under 4 feet of water by planting my feet, leaning upstream and letting it scoot me along.
Surfed that mountain!
A good ride was had by all.

Whitewater Falls

On the NC, SC border.

Top of Panthertown Valley

A good spot for lunch after a swim in a waterfall, a hike through varied foliage, and before more "wild and scenic" river action.
That's the official title: "National Wild and Scenic Rivers".
So I shouted "wild and scenic" when I changed from my hiking shorts into my bathing suit in front of God, the water, and the trees.

Cooling feet at Devils Elbow

This was an intricate formation in Panthertown.
Way upstream the Devils Elbow started out deep and seemed still. It dropped, turned left, right, went who knows where, then came out around here where we accessed it again. Plenty of wash-out spots to get in if you want cold jacuzzi invigoration.

I'd like to thank . . . .

. . . The SFGate, the online arm of the San Francisco daily newspaper.
They asked for a defining image of summer 2005.
One of the top 5 selected images was our July 4th post:
SFGate Culture Blog:Summer 2005
(scroll down to the sunflower)

they wrote to us:
"Your many "fans of bigbonton" are enthusiastic lobbyists
with a keen eye for talent."

Thanks! You flatter me.
Keep those cards and letters coming!

mid-September, on the road again

Harvest Moon 2005 rising over the old Hwy 40 in western Colorado. Heading east to Denver after a Rocky Mountain excursion.

Yes, this is a recent photo, not a shot from last October 2004.
Needed some thin dry air after surviving my most humid and sweaty summer in decades in the Sea Islands of the Low Country.

Colorado wildflowers on Table.

click on image to enlarge in new window

South Table Rock, Golden, CO

We hiked to the top of the butte / mesa after work.

Above the Alpine Tundra.

click on image to enlarge in new window


This marker is also called the top of the Rockies although it's not over 14,000 feet up. It shows direction and distance.
I just love saying "alpine" and "tundra"
so when I can say "Alpine Tundra", well, yee-Haa!

Bull Elk

A bit grainy, this big guy stood head-and-shoulders taller than everything. Add the rack and he was Moose sized.
A whole lotta meat!

Meadow in Rocky Mtn National Park.

click on image to enlarge in new window



Fly fishing on the left, rushing waters on the right, peaks ahead. In every view there is always a larger peak looming in the distance.

yellow Aspens 2005

a bit early in the season, off in the distance

Hanging Lake

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Hanging Lake II

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Hanging Lake III

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This was a little Hawaiian Eden in the Rockies.
To get there step 1.2 miles up a 1200 Ft elevation gain.
Near Glenwood Canyon, Colorado.
We're big fans of canyons, they have the most dramatic features.

Baseball in Denver

Colorado Rockies vs Arizona Diamondbacks


Of course the Rockies lost, not even close.
Saw Arizona Diamondbacks second basemen Craig Counsell bat with that peculiar stance he has.

Better hurry if you want to see the Rockies play, it's late September, they won't play much longer this year.
For you un-sporting readers: this is a post season play-offs joke.
- I once went to Wrigley Field. The Cubs were not playing, it was October . . . (same joke).

Does anyone know why the AZ pitcher was thrown out of the game? Happened in the 9th inning & by then we were having too much fun in the stands to pay much attention.

Spiders from Mars

A Kansas City-based UFO expert says Mars is inhabited by giant spider-like creatures.
The expert also says orbiting Mars probes have photographed large sponge-like creatures similar to tumbleweeds rolling across the Martian landscape on a regular basis.
The floating, rolling, and tumbling process is apparently an established transportation method.

In this actual photograph (above), local NASA affiliate bonton laboratory has re-created an image from the red planet to enlighten our readers. The use of night vision lenses resulted in the green hue.
(He took it all too far, but boy could he play guitar)

Faces in the Water

Look!

So far 3 visions have materialized in the above photo.
So go ahead & look. Stare, you will see.

It is now nearly impossible to tell
where Lake Pontchartrain ends and the city of New Orleans begins.
The Crescent City is practically destroyed ...

Katrina and the Wave has harshed our mellow.

Don't it make you feel bad
When you're tryin' to find your way home,
You don't know which way to go?

Cryin' won't help you, prayin' won't do you no good,
When the levee breaks, mama, you got to move.

All last night sat on the levee and moaned,
Thinkin' about my baby and my happy home.

Mean old levee taught me to weep and moan,
Oh, well, oh, well, oh, well.


- LED ZEPPELIN - When The Levee Breaks

Cactus Bloom

This is the bloom of a cactus plant, do you know the name?
[see comments: Hairy Giant Starfish Flower, a carrion flower]

It blooms at night, stays open for about 1 day then wilts.
During that time it stinks - hints of low tide, spoiled seafood, dead fish, etc. Some fragrance!

I think I've heard of these in Death Valley, CA.
A backpacker said they awoke to find their desert world alive with beautiful blooms but it took a while for them to connect those flowers to the stinking smell they also awoke to, described as "dirty feet" or "hiking boots with a special Death Valley sauce", and "something very wrong that we must fix right away".

The blossom features tiny hairlike projections (not captured in the photo), very fine and beautiful. Nice pattern and the sort of plant you want to touch.
On the right are 3 pods that will bloom next, one at a time, at night, lasting for one day. Hold your nose! One bloom at a time sounds like Mother Nature doesn't want to stink you out, just wants to broadcast and protect the short lived blossom.

Nice cactus bloom visually and tactilely, but olfactorily it is a real piece of work. What a mechanism to pollinate and defend itself, it stinks!
If only it were that easy for me.
I can stink with the best of 'em.

blue crab boiler

Feeding the masses.

click photo to enlarge in new window

See how Blue the Blue Crabs are pre-steaming?

We spent hours cooking and eating several tubs of these blue crabs,
along with shrimp, flounder, new potatoes, corn on the cobb, sausages,
and anything else that wasn't nailed down.

Catch It.
Cook It &
Eat It!

Elvis Lives!
He stopped by Saturday night, looked good,
was cutting up with the karate chops in the yard with the kids.
What an appetite!

tray full of food at Lester's BBQ

Write-up to follow, right now I'm too BBQ blissed out
to speak.

click photo to enlarge in new window

This is a 5 star establishment.

Shut up sammich

This is what you get
when you do not time your lunch right.

click photo to enlarge in new window

Showing up for lunch at 3pm does not get you into the BBQ buffet (which was our reason for being there).
For now I'm not naming any names of this Q joint because I want to return during normal hours to review this establishment with a post-BBQ-buffet glow.
They are deserving of your business and my off-schedule experience may dampen your enthusiasm for patronizing the joint. It's a family biz and they're good folks.
Founder Big Pappy (BBQ pseudonym) made a leap of faith and tried to provide for his boys by starting a restaurant during the depression by selling the family cow and mule - their source of dairy and veggies.
One son, the proprietor of this place, might have eaten a lot of cabbage cole slaw while growing up.

For you soft handed urbanites:
cow = milk, butter, cheese;
mule = plow, thus = vegetable garden.
Email me for further clarification, including "what's a mule?".
Also welcome are reader comments on "40 acres & a mule", the allegory of dead mules in Southern literature, or covers of "Mule Skinner Blues".

back to the story.
The place has been around a while, they have good food. Seen above are:

mustard base BBQ sauce. Tangy with mustard and vinegar,
this sauce wants to be a symbol of SC BBQ
and it is a metaphor of the economic situation of South Carolina.
It's an isolated sauce, found only in regional enclaves.
While worthy and competitive it is not well known nor much sought after beyond its origin primarily due to unpolished presentation and being overshadowed by more effective communication delivered by the BBQ of neighboring NC, GA, VA.
As goes mustard BBQ sauce
so goes South Carolina's economic indicators.

The one huge onion ring has more batter than the law allows.
But since it looks like the Apple QuickTime logo I like it. I just didn't eat it without peeling off all that fried batter.

The sandwich was good but we came for their buffet with smoked meat, this is some sort of potroasted or oven cooked pork. While tasty and tender it's just a sandwich on a bad wonderbread burger roll, not that fire & smoke-based cooking we've been spoiled by.
Oh! I just realized what this sandwich is made of: Buffet leftovers.

I hung out a while and read the local free rag with the "shut up" hand on the cover. Lunch after 3pm did get me a good caffeine buzz - refills from the self-serve soda stand. Enough so that while awake at 12:45 AM I figured I'd had way too much diet coke 7 hours prior.

Stand by for their full review!

Ol' Snake Boot

Snake Boot / cargador de la serpiente

click to enlarge

Snake Skin boots con Snake Head.
It took at least one snake per boot.
I couldn't decide which profile I liked best so the whole collage gets posted for your pleasure. Can't you just hear the snake rattle?

Hint Hint:
Only 16 more shopping days until my Birthday on the 17th.
Hint Hint:
Snake Skin boots never go out of style . . .
But those heads would soon be kicked loose,
I stub my toes daily.
They wouldn't look so vicious / vicioso
after a few days on my feet.

While daydreaming about wearing these bad snake headed boots I got one mango and one coconut frozen fruit on a stick.
The cashier was busy with a fly-swatter
keeping the place fly-free, which took some faith that it was even possible.
Good for her,
gracious, I mean gracias!

Seafood Social

This photo shows my chow position at the sawhorse and plywood table.
We are way out here where the June Bugs sing, the locusts drone and the humidity has won.
Give it up y'all, looking calm cool & collected
just ain't gonna happen tonight.

This is my corner of the table:

click on them to name those bugs!

As the Czechs in Bohemia say, it's "cucumber season",
with all the double entendre a hot summer deserves.

Shed your addiction to comfort, it's making you soft.
Release the pretense, be so sans souci,
do without dippity do for a day. Feel a bead from your own cooling system trickle down your scalp.
Just leave it and get elemental.
Drop any effort in an outdoors of consumption, sweat & talk.
We socialize by melting together.

Ladies: any makeup, disco war paint, or Kabuki mask will not work out here in this steamed Eden.
Go au naturale or stay miles away in your A/C protected safe zone,
lest your face appears to melt when that face-paint drips and smears.

Uh . . . when I said "go au naturale", um, before you show up nude, dropping into our al fresco neither region, . . .
oh, drop it, it's too darn hot.
Just show up with
baby powder & a smile in your T-shirt & shorts.

Guys: Summer is on us like a load.
Either your sit-up regime has paid off or Dunlap disease has taken over since winter, as in your belly done lapped over your belt.
Let your shirt stick to your back but don't let your posture melt. Smile while telling a light hearted tale when it's your turn to entertain.
Expound on the art of the peel-&-eat. Eat with your hands, play with your food - especially the claws.

Hot & Humid Hints:
A white T does not show perspiration like a color T.
White is this seasons black.
It's OK to bring an extra dry shirt. Some bring hand towels to prevent excess drippage.
Avon Skin-So-Soft for the Ladies and Bait Shop for men is the fragrance du jour.
Nervous or Sour? Stay away, the air is thick enough without attitude. We're surviving this together &
we are having fun (yet) it sure is hot.
(long deep breath, exhale & sigh)

There's more than plenty to eat.
Hang around, slouch, lean, talk, peel shrimp, crack crab, look around, listen to how loud bugs and frogs can be in real life.

Just go slow, take it easy.
The only rush: drink fast to enjoy a cool beverage or two from under the ice. Rationale: liquids return to a luke-warm state real quick 'round here.
We're way down yonder where the wild things are.

For our Eastern European cousins that think
seafood looks like insects, there's sausage-kolbasz, corn du la cob, even potatoes-krumpli. You crazy dry-heat landlocked Euro's, I know you're reading this in Prague, Budapest, Pecs, Krokow: tudod es az nem boi. Sammi boi, ez nyaris most. Boldog Nyar ket-ezer-ot. Vagyok kes delis, delirious, delicious. [Spelling corrections welcome]

+ 92 degrees, + 95% humidity.
Stay in the shade & detox through steambath dining.
A mid-summer purification ritual!